THE DUTIES OF HUSBANDS AND WIVES

by Richard Steele, Puritan 

A Modern Abridgment and Paraphrase 

by D. Scott Meadows 

“Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband”—Ephesians 5:33.

Marriage is the foundation of all society, and so this topic is very important. Explaining marital duties to you is  much easier than persuading you to do them. Conform your will to Scripture, not vice versa. Take Ephesians 5:33 to heart.

1. The Connection. “Nevertheless” is a transition from the spiritual reality of Christ’s relationship to the church.

It either means that in spite of the unattainable ideal, strive to attain it, or because of the noble example, imitate it, in your relationship with your spouse.

2. The Direction.

A. The universal obligation of it. “Let each one of you,” no matter how good you are or how bad your spouse.

All husbands are entitled to their wives’ respect, whether they are wise or foolish, intelligent or slow, skillful or clumsy. All wives are entitled to their husbands’ love, whether beautiful or ugly, rich or poor, submissive or rebellious.

B. The particular application of it. “In particular,” each and every husband and wife should apply this to their own particular case.

3. Summary of Duties.

A. Every husband’s duty. To love his wife. This is not the only duty but it includes all others. He should love her as himself. This is both how (the Golden Rule) and why he is to love her (because they are both really one, loving her will result in blessings to him).

B. Every wife’s duty. To fear (Greek) or reverence (KJV) or respect (NKJV) her husband, both for his person and his position. This necessarily includes love, because if she loves him, she will try to please him, and avoid offending him.

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