THE DUTIES OF HUSBANDS AND WIVES

by Richard Steele, Puritan 

A Modern Abridgment and Paraphrase 

by D. Scott Meadows 

“Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband”—Ephesians 5:33.

Marriage is the foundation of all society, and so this topic is very important. Explaining marital duties to you is  much easier than persuading you to do them. Conform your will to Scripture, not vice versa. Take Ephesians 5:33 to heart.

1. The Connection. “Nevertheless” is a transition from the spiritual reality of Christ’s relationship to the church.

It either means that in spite of the unattainable ideal, strive to attain it, or because of the noble example, imitate it, in your relationship with your spouse.

2. The Direction.

A. The universal obligation of it. “Let each one of you,” no matter how good you are or how bad your spouse.

All husbands are entitled to their wives’ respect, whether they are wise or foolish, intelligent or slow, skillful or clumsy. All wives are entitled to their husbands’ love, whether beautiful or ugly, rich or poor, submissive or rebellious.

B. The particular application of it. “In particular,” each and every husband and wife should apply this to their own particular case.

3. Summary of Duties.

A. Every husband’s duty. To love his wife. This is not the only duty but it includes all others. He should love her as himself. This is both how (the Golden Rule) and why he is to love her (because they are both really one, loving her will result in blessings to him).

B. Every wife’s duty. To fear (Greek) or reverence (KJV) or respect (NKJV) her husband, both for his person and his position. This necessarily includes love, because if she loves him, she will try to please him, and avoid offending him.

Read more...---> HERE.

The Special Duties of Husbands to their Wives

QUOTE:  He that will expect duty or comfort from his wife, must be faithful in doing the duty of a husband. The failing of yourselves in your own duty, may cause the failing of another to you, or at least in some other way as much afflict you, and will be bitterer to you in the end, than if a hundred failed their duty to you. A good husband will either make a good wife, or easily and profitably endure a bad one. I shall therefore give you directions for your own part of duty, as that which your happiness is most concerned in.

The Special Duties of Husbands to their Wives by Richard Baxter

Marriage License?

Who instituted the marriage license? Something to think about.

"If a man and a man marry with a State marriage license, and a man and woman marry without a State marriage license - who’s really married? Is it the two men with a marriage license, or the man and woman without a marriage license? In reality, this contention that people are not really married unless they obtain a marriage license simply reveals how Statist we are in our thinking."

Taken from this article - 5 Reasons Why Christians Should Not Obtain a State Marriage License by Pastor Matt Trewhella

I don't agree with this author's perspective on same sex marriage - and would classify it as God does, sin.  There is some interesting information regarding the history of the marriage license and the fight for those of color (or the lack thereof) to marry.  The point is...marriage is not mandated by the State, it is a God given institution and should follow HIS rules/standards.

Why the Ugly Rhetoric Against Gay Marriage Is Familiar to this Historian of Miscegenation

Buying Beef

(Note:  This post is from another site where I posted to the forums - hence the dating is a while back, well a year and 5 months ago to be exact!)

Today...buyng beef...why? Because I just bought a 1/4 (split a side with a friend) and thought I would share.

We bought 1/4 last year...there are only 2 of us and it lasted (except for the hamburger) until now...though I ended up with a LOT of briskets and only recently found one easy crockpot recipe that came out well. Sooo...if anyone has an easy brisket recipe, please share - and since it is warming up NOT using the oven is the preferred method!  

Buying in bulk saves money...this angus steer: hanging weight 622# - our 1/4 155.50#. Finished weight estimate 130...with cost per # at $2.87.

Hanging weight is different from finished - depending on the type of beef, extra lean, average, fat etc... here is a link if you want more information.

http://www.extension.umn.edu/distribution/nutrition/DJ0598.html

or

http://pods.dasnr.okstate.edu/docushare/dsweb/Get/Document-2059/F-3401web.pdf

Buying a whole or 1/2 is the preferred method and then splitting from there...otherwise you may get stuck with only the 1/4 front (not much meat).

You usually get an option on soup bones (great for making broth, soup bases) and organ meats (if you want them), or I have a friend who feeds them to her dogs.

Buying a whole or a 1/2 may not be a viable option for a single woman, but would work if you go in together with a few others and split it further.

Most butchers will work with you in splitting beyond the 1/2...you also get the option of how much fat you want (or do not) in your ground beef...we prefer ours lean. The size of your steaks etc.

Also, knowing your farmer or the person coordinating the beef buy helps ensure that you are getting a quality animal that has not been wined, dined and refined.

Additionally, the cost savings is amazing...I found one site that estimated for a family of 4 the grocery bill is $770 a month...even dividing that by 2 brings the cost to $385...I can not even imagine!

Site: http://www.thesimpledollar.com/2008/09/01/whats-an-appropriate-home-food-budget-for-a-family-of-four/

Meats, fresh produce are usually the most expensive items in a family grocery budget...here are a few more sites if you want to explore:

http://www.keeperofthehome.org/2009/05/how-my-grocery-budget-works.html

Appreciated the title on the one above! She estimated her meat cost at $50 a month...which included poultry (we have our own) so my $30 a month for beef is a great deal!

I browsed week 6 of this blog...

http://theemptykitchen.wordpress.com/the-aldi-experiment/

Blessings sisters!

Cleavage, Bikinis and Facebook

Straight Talk to Young Women

by Alyssa Shull

Glad I got your attention. Let’s start by going in order of my title here.

Cleavage

It says in 1 Corinthians 10:32, “Don’t cause others to stumble, whether they are Jewish, Greek, or members of God’s church” (GWT). I take that passage to mean this: Do your part to help someone not fall into sin. As a woman I strive to not portray my body in a way that would cause someone to lust. How do I do this? It starts with how I dress.

When a female is wearing a shirt that shows off her cleavage, people usually look. I believe when a woman purposefully shows her cleavage it sends out the message: “Hey, here are my boobs, I want you to notice I have them.”

Read more here.

Head Coverings

This is in no way an exhaustive representation of the different views on head coverings.

For the last year or so I have wrestled back and forth, back and forth with this issue, trying to NOT allow my feminist upbringing to influence my perceptions and/or understanding of what the Word of God says.

This first link is an audio clip:  Covering and Uncovering the Head.

I am going to listen to it again - the speaker/teacher makes some excellent points. One of the thoughts:  "If women are to be covered and IF hair is the covering that would require men to be bald or shaven."

I have a few questions which popped up, but as I stated, I will need to listen again to make sure I understood what was being said.

This article:  The Issue of Head Coverings  is one I came across a while back, pros and cons with it as well.

Praying for all my sisters (and ME) to be submissive to the Word of the Lord, desiring to be conformed to HIM and not allow the teachings, beliefs, and/or cultural behaviors to stay us from fulling following HIM.

11/11/11 - 4:00 P.M. CDT - A sister shared with me that she and her husband have read, re-read and re-read the passage in question and keep coming to the same conclusion, that it is about authority.


As I put that in my hopper and started pondering upon it...the next question became, so what was Eve wearing?

The Marital Cup

Marriage is like handblown glass, delicate in substance but strong in construction. It can hold the vintage of years gone by. A cup blessed and preserved by God.

What keeps a marriage?

Only the nearness of God.

Read more...

Thoughts for Suitors

Some thoughts for guys (suitors in particular)

"This is a bit of a follow-up on my "Musings on Divine Romance" thread, you might want to check that out at some point. These are a bit more of my musings, more specifically for guys who are suitors or aspire to be. It's a bit of the practical outworking of the Divine Romance . . .

Christ sacrifices Himself for His Bride, the Church. And even so, men are called to sacrifice for the ladies whom they would court. Christ from all eternity puts Himself on the line and determines to die for the chosen people even when she is rebellious and wallowing in the mud of sin. Now, not all are called to court a prostitute as Hosea was, but the principle of sacrifice remains.

I have seen a lot of girls--friends and relatives, some on SGS, some not--get hurt by thoughtlessness and a man putting himself before the one he is courting. I'm writing this in the hope that I might help to prevent it from happening again to anyone I care about. These incidents are not only avoidable, but avoiding them should be the FIRST priority of any man who would undertake to court a lady. So here's a list of general principles that I'd like to share. Not all of them are valid in every context, and that is why they are general. But I think they are good guidelines.

1) Seek oversight early. As soon as you cross the line from "hey we're just friends" to "Huh, let's see if there is something here." Make yourself accountable to parents, pastor, and/or elders. This is for your protection and hers. You should welcome it."

...continue reading....

"Her poetic appeals on behalf of women were perhaps not so much an outcry of injustice than a plea for men to have a more complementarian view."

Enjoyed this article Women of the Reformation: Anne Bradstreet by Elizabeth DeBarros. Especially as I have begun to research the topic of complementarian.

There are at least 2 camps regarding women - the evangelical feminist (egalitarian view) or the complementarian view.  I am in the midst of reading a book by Alex Strauch, titled Men and Women, Equal Yet Different.

May Father bless His daughters to be diligent to make their calling and election sure, desiring to be found on par with Sarah.